The GONNA-be-60 BIRTHDAY BLUES

A co-worker was moanin' the blues 3 weeks ago about her upcoming 60th. So I wrote a song for her that day. Today, her birthday, she was fine. Of course the cake and ice cream helped! Maybe you can relate. Make up your own tune, and toss in the chorus anytime you want to!

I'm gonna be 60. Yeah, that's what I know.
Let's see what'll happen to my get-up-and-go ...
I try to do somethin', to remember and "thank", [think]
But my brain pops a burp and all I get is a blank.

Chorus:
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!
I got them low-oh-down, run-outa-town
Si-i-xty blu-oohs!

It's just psycholog'cal, yeah, that's what I say,
But it's the big 60 on my next birthday ...
My height is a'shrinkin'. It's gone to my hips.
Some parts are all leaky like a sinkin' ol' ship.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!
I got them low-oh-down, move outa-town,
Si-i-xty blu-oohs!

My 50s were crazy, witchy then high,
Jumpin' and jivin', laughin' then cry.
At least I'm not 70. I ain't got white hair.
Sometimes I feel 80, like some sway-back ol' mare.

My skin's gettin' crinkly. It's spotted and blue.
My eyes, they are cloudy, can't hardly see through.
Instead of hot flashes, now I stay cold.
Ol' man calls me frigid just like the North Pole,

What 'uz skinny is fa-at, and what's fat is now slid.
I'm still the same gal, but that young gal done hid.
I went over the hi-il when I fell on the floor.
I feel like ol' Debil [Devil] of Death's at my door.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!
I got them low-oh-down, get outa town,
Big 60 is cookin'! Yeah, I'm still good lookin'!
Ain't gonna run down! Let's paint the town!
Si-i-xty blu-oohs!